Monday, September 9, 2013

To my Scarlette, with love on your 4th birthday

Dear Scarlette~

Holy moly! You are four today! That is almost unbelievable to me! I still remember so vividly the day (night) I found out I was pregnant with you and how excited we were! The day you were born (and how scared we were). The day we got to hold you and how PERFECT you were. And are. You are perfect! Do you know that? When God made you he decided to make you really special! He decided that you got to be MORE than just the rest of us! He decided that He was going to use you to teach us SO many new, scary and WONDERFUL things.Because of You I have learned to value life, I have learned to appreciate the MIRACLE of the small things, I have learned patience, oh boy has that been a hard one. Patient is one thing your mommy is not! But I'm learning! I have learned to laugh at death, literally to find humor in things others would cower at. I have learned so much about faith, and what it means to truly and totally put my trust in God. I have learned not to sweat the small stuff and also not to take things for granted! I have learned to give others grace, because we never know what trials they are facing. I have learned that what we think we deserve we don't, and just because our life is different from what we thought it should be doesn't mean it is worse or less fulfilling. Look at all you have taught me in these four years. And I'm still learning! You have SO much to teach us that I may not have learned if God didn't give you to us. If He didn't trust us to care for you. Sometimes I question His intent, sometimes I don't feel up to the challenge and I feel like I'm failing you. But I know God's plan is PERFECT so I know that you are with us for a reason. I feel honored. He definitely thinks more highly of me than I do.

In all that you have taught me you have learned some things too! In the last year we have had some setbacks, but we have also had some MAJOR milestones! You started standing up while holding our hands for small amounts of time, and most recently you started being able to hold yourself for a second before you fell. You have learned somewhat clumsily how to get yourself off the couch. You allow your sister to play with and on you and you do it with a smile. You have recently started babbling much more and even vocalizing new sounds. You went through a very hormonal phase about six months ago where everything and anything that you didn't want to have anything to do with made you cry (that one was fun let me tell you!). And you re-started therapy which you have been doing great at, even if you vocally protest every time you have to change positions!

You also have some new loves this year. You LOVE and I mean love bordering on loving more than mommy Sofia the 1st. The only time you and sissy are quiet in the morning is when mommy turns it on (and praises Jesus while doing so ;0) ). You really love Auntie KC's doggie Komo, and have been so interested in all the other doggies you have met and seen this year. I hope one day we can get you a hypoallergenic companion dog. I truly never thought you would take to animals the way you have! You love your sissy, we can tell you really do! You watch her and you let her play with you, and you are almost never mad at her. Except when she blocks the TV. You LOVE music and you LOVE the ladies at church who sit with you and play music the entire time you are in Sunday school. They have no idea how much peace they bring to mommy and daddy for that hour knowing that you are safe and happy.

Baby girl, I would have never chosen this life for you, but I would be wrong. You are doing exactly what you were put on this earth to do. You have reached so many people. Your joy is felt by anyone who's around you when you smile. Your heart is so pure and you are just so special and so wonderful. You have accomplished more in 4 years than I have in 27 and I hope I can be more like you when I grow up.

Love, Mommy